Lovan Phrases and Script

“It is nice to be alone every once and awhile.” Cousin to me when we were hanging out at my grandparents’ house.

“The flavoring is just right, not too much.” My parents to me after making cinnamon sugar popcorn.

“I don’t understand what these halo things are or what they do.” My mom said out loud to no in particular playing Toy Blast.

“Those are portals. The box goes into one and out the other. They are kinda like doors.” Me trying to explain portals to my mom.

“When the sun is out the guns are out. (Referring to muscles)” Guy in my Spanish class to one of his friends talking about weather and temperature.

The ‘Interplanetary Tourist and Trash Portal Incident’

By

Leah Lovan

EXT. Futuristic market place-sunny midday

Devin, coworker Vash, and Tourist dubbed Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist (by Devin) walk down market place pointing out certain shops. They walk up to a food vendor and order. Devin looks very annoyed from all the endless stupid questions from the interplanetary tourist.

Vash

Crevroon is very good and is a traditional food on Tarleen. And no one serves in better it than Aevum’s. The flavoring is just right, not too much.

Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist looks suspiciously at food. Devin rolls eyes, annoyed.

Mr. AnnoyintonTourist

Are you sure I can eat this?

Devin

(annoyed)

Yes! Just eat it or you can throw it away!

Devin points to trash portal and Vash glares at Devin.

Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist

I don’t understand what these halo things are or what they do.

Vash

Those are portals. The box goes into one and out the other. They are kinda like doors. You throw your trash in and it goes straight to the trash incinerator.

Mr. AnnoyintonTourist walks toward trash portal and inspects it. Devin and Vash follow.

Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist

But how do they work? What’s that thing under the halo? How does it move something?

Devin

When the sun is out the guns are out.

Vash

What my coworker means is that the thing underneath the portal is the gun that opens the portal and they are solar powered. Portals are openings in space. They make far away things easily to reach by bending space to make it closer than it is.

Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist

But why does it move over there? How does it make things closer?

Devin

(Grinding teeth)

He just said it. They bend space.

Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist

How do they bend space? How do these halos move something?

Vash starts talking but Devin cuts him off.

Devin

(yelling)

There is not a more simple explanation! If your stupid little head can’t comprehend it maybe you should try it for yourself!

Devin grabs Mr. AnnoyingtonTourist and throws him into the trash portal. Vash stares in disbelief. Devin starts walking away.

Devin

It is nice to be alone every once and awhile. Tourist are always so annoying.

Vash

(Chasing after Devin)

Great you just got us fired from another job! That’s the sixth one this month!